3.5 stars
I picked this up completely on a whim whilst browsing in the library. I don't agree with everything she says, but it is well written and an easy read if a bit depressing at times. It is not just about her losing her job and having to make her way in the world of freelance journalism. She deals with the subject of keeping it together when life throws you a curveball either from illness, bereavement or other more mundane sources. She gives examples from her own life, her friends and other folks she has interviewed over the years. ( )

Freud referred to love and work as “the cornerstones of our humanness” and although Christina Patterson’s search for love was leaving something to be desired, at least she felt that her love of her job was keeping her going through life’s ups and downs. However, when the editor of The Independent, the paper she had worked for for ten years, informed her that he had decided to “freshen the pages up” and was making her redundant, she was suddenly faced with the loss of one of those cornerstones, one she had spent her whole working life building up. Fearful about what her future held, struggling with the profoundly undermining nature of rejection, she nevertheless found the inner resources to embark on this book. It is a story which intertwines the experiences of others with her own as she explores the nature of loss, disappointment and resilience, in their many varied forms, and examines the various ways in which people find it possible to move forward from personal crises.
This searingly honest and moving book comprises a series of conversations Christina had with people in her life who had faced hardship in one form or another. It soon becomes very clear that one of the reasons people were enabled to open up to her with such honesty was because of the perceptive empathy she demonstrated in her interactions with them. I was a subscriber to The Independent during the period when Christina was writing her columns and was always eager to read her thought-provoking, sensitive and, at their very heart deeply humane, reflections on a wide range of topics. When those columns ended so abruptly I felt a real sense of loss, as well as a belief that the paper had lost someone, and something, essentially important. However, whilst reading this book, I became aware that the author, however painful and upsetting her brutal dismissal, has lost none of her skills in getting to the heart of the matter in her writing. She manages to convey a belief that the troughs of life’s experiences can be climbed out of, however bleak it may feel when down in their depths – nevertheless, whilst you are in them it’s some comfort to discover that friends, food, crisps and wine can make the troughs feel infinitely more tolerable and survivable! She achieves this without any sense of dismissing the pain of difficult experiences but rather with the supportive message that it really is worth hanging on to hope.
What a roller-coaster of a ride this book took me and my emotions on: one moment I was laughing out loud at some of the hilarious situations described, then I’d find myself suddenly moved to tears by the poignant, heart-breaking nature of some of the life-stories which emerged. I also found myself feeling angry about the lack of humanity shown by so many organisations when it comes to making people redundant. “Streamlining” may well make sense in economic and efficiency terms, but all too often takes no account of the level of human misery, even despair, which can result – I think that if The Independent still existed in print form, having read this powerful and moving book, I would have been cancelling my subscription! However, I do believe that the author has demonstrated that she has emerged stronger than ever and that, to paraphrase part of her Frieda Hughes quote, she has absolutely “done her best with the tools she had to hand.” It was a joy to be reminded of just how perceptive, incisive and sensitive a writer Christina Patterson is, and how elegant and engaging her prose always is. This is not a “preachy self-help” book but it is one which will make anyone struggling with loss, stress, a sense of failure and lack of self-worth feel rather less isolated, able to start to believe that there can be a better future.

My thanks to Real Readers and Atlantic Books for sending me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. ( )

This put me in mind of articles I have read in women's magazines about how people have faced adversity and come out of it stronger or wiser and made changes in their lives. These articles are supposed to be motivational but on the whole I suspect most readers are not inspired to take action, but find them fascinating reading because we are so interested in other people's lives.
I don't think Christina Patterson is claiming to be inspirational but she has written an interesting book about surviving difficult times as experienced by her or friends and interviewees.
There are no startling insights, though she does reinforce some familiar ideas about what is important for happiness, including good friends (reminding us that friendship needs to be worked at), appreciating small pleasures, love and kindness, and finding fulfilling work that may not be our ideal but can help finance our real passions.
The author is clearly no fan of self-help books but her writing may encourage us to take stock of our own lives and try to do better. ( )