Mary Turner Thomson

My family has had Amazon Prime for many years and I will admit that I have picked my early release books religiously but this has to be one of the few times a book has caught my attention to want to read it as quick as I have.
This is the true-life first-hand story of Will Jordan, a sociopath-psychopath grifter, a con man who left women in dire straits in both the UK, Mexico, and the US. His pattern was to attract them online, commit bigamy in many cases, impregnate them, extort money from them and then abandon them.

The author follows not only her story but that of other women victimized by Will Jordan, who was also apparently a pedophile. His trail of victims led to tragedy including suicide. The victims banded together via Facebook and shared information about the crimes, which in past were often covered up out of shame and embarrassment.

The Facebook group also gave information on Will Jordan, who having been convicted and imprisoned, was trying to have his sentence reduced to minimum supervision to have his sentence carried out as "community service" rather than in jail. This man was not only a sociopath, he was deemed a psychopath because his score on the scale of abnormal reactions and emotions was so high. Because of the Facebook group, eight additional women testified along with one woman against the reduced sentence so that a judge denied the request for inclusion in this minimal program--the power of social media in communication, exchange of vital information, and cooperation cannot be over-stressed. A fascinating case.

The group also found gaps in the reporting system for recording pedophiles and sex offenders--a simple lack of putting in data to the system and there was no record of him in the system at one point.

What I loved about this book is that it brought me back to my college days and I loved it. I learned all about the PCL-R I own a copy of The Mask of Sanity, so to be able to remember as much as I did while reading this was lots of fun. I commend Mary Turner Thomson for her bravery in being able to speak to all the women that reached out to her with such an open mind and an open heart. I am not sure that many people in her shoes would be able to do the same. I have already decided to read the other book that is linked to her marriage and can’t wait to see how it expands my understanding of this book.

… (mere)

I own Jenny's books but I haven't read them. The anxiety of knowing they were going to be so relatable and emotionally hard for me to make my way through was keeping me from reading them. BUT I knew they were going to be my favorite if I ever got the courage to read them so I kept buying them because support your people, all right?

Somehow I logged into Libby at the exact right time for this book to be available via audiobook on release day and it was fate. So I spend four hours crying but also laughing so hard it looked like I was crying. Because Jenny knows how to tell a story. (If you follow her blog, you already know this.)

The book is structured in a memoir/diary. She spills her guts on everything from day to day happenings to her childhood, and medical complications. For us to wad in and discover that we aren't so alone. Our broken existence is normal to other people too.

I recommend the audiobook times a million because she narrates it *in the best possible way.*

It's hard to put this book into words. If you suffer from depression or anxiety, or any debilitating condition really, I can assure you that there is something in this book for you. Even if it's just to see how someone deals with the cards they were dealt. Heck even if you're one of those people that has literally none of those things going on in your life, you'll probably also laugh at many of the chapters in this one.

Jenny is my people. She understands parts of me that I don't even understand. I would say I could totally see having coffee with her but that would be a lie. Because it would be awkward, as neither of us get coffee with people, or enjoy public, or people. So not literal coffee. I just mean that she is raw, and open about her struggles, and it is refreshing.

Normalizing the conversations around mental health build up those suffering from mental health things.

We all have battles for facing, we can't compare the battle, but we can take note as to how other deal with the fight. Laughter is always a weapon I want to keep in my arsenal. While we only see the curated parts of her life, they are crafted in a way that screams it's okay to be broken.


Note: HP mention.… (mere)

This book took me a couple of tries to get through. The beginning I found to be repetitive. For me, this made the beginning boring. Then I began to feel like I was being forcefully convinced of “the facts,” (this is her truth so I’m not insinuating it’s a lie or debating anything. I believe her. It was a feeling brought on by the repetition.). This had me starting and stopping the book.
At the end of the book, I felt like she still has issues she needs to deal with. I understand that she wants to get word out about him. I also understand the importance of talking about bigamy, psychopaths, sociopaths and narcissism, (and abuse of any kind. Feeling alone isolates and hurts incredibly. It also leaves you vulnerable.). I just started feeling like she was having an unhealthy obsession, (MY feeling. Certainly not a professional opinion. I’m also not insinuating anything other than what I felt.), with Will Jordan. I also got some narcissistic vibes from her but, as I believe we all have that to a degree, hopefully it is a healthy degree. I think having gone through something like this, you need to be able to take care of you. It just started to feel a bit like her importance was over the top. I felt like she was telling me that she was an expert who couldn’t possibly ever be a victim again and therefore she could and was saving everyone else. Please don’t let this deter you from the book or her first book, (which I have not read). I think she has some very good points in the book and she has included a lot of helpful information. I also do believe, even though the way it was written was an issue for me, that her story is important for validating her experience and possibly many other people’s experiences. I think it may help others with seeing their own relationship more clearly, especially if it is abusive in any way.
If you are interested in this book, I would encourage you to read the sample from both of her books and see how you feel about the writing. You may decide one, the other, or both appeal to you. Remember that reviews are basically opinions based on the reader’s feelings and possibly their knowledge or personal experience with the subject. Just because it didn’t fully work for me, (or possibly other reviewers), doesn’t mean that will be your experience. Explore the samples. If it is available in the Kindle Unlimited program maybe try it there first or request from your library, (if you are still uncertain if it is for you). I have a copy, which I am grateful to have, so if I need to check back on some information that was helpful, I can. She has a load of helpful information at the end of the book. You may decide that would work well for you.
*I won a copy of this book in a Goodreads Giveaway. I wrote a voluntary review that is based upon what I thought of the book and what I felt helpful to know.*


… (mere)

⭐️⭐️ 1/2 stars

I’m disappointed as I so expected to enjoy this book more. I’m fascinated by criminal psychology, I love true crime, and I love memoirs, so it felt like this book would be an unbeatable combination for me. To be fair, I did not realize this book was a sequel to the authors first book,”The Bigamist”, which I have not read. Perhaps it would have made a difference.

The story follows the author and her ex-husband (a real-life criminal psychopath and bigamist) after the unraveling of her world which I understand was described in detail in The Bigamist. In this book, we hear about the aftermath of the author’s life, as she picks herself up and builds a new life for herself, and about the continuing exploits of her repulsive ex husband. As the author works through her own recovery, she learn more about psychopathy, builds a new career, fortifies her own physical resilience, and finds great comfort in helping others (and in particular, those, like herself, whom her husband has victimized).

The author has done her homework and there was some interesting research sited, as well as a annotated appendix, that I will follow up on. I have read Dr. Robert D.Hare’s “Without Conscience” (which I loved) as well as Jon Ronson’s “The Psychopath Test”, (which I liked a lot), both of which are cited in this book.

I also enjoyed the author’s rating, early in the book, of her ex-husband according to Dr Hare’s PCL-R psychopath checklist, and found the examples of behavior she described for each category quite interesting. I also enjoyed the discussion presented on what makes a victim appealing to a psychopath.

I did not enjoy the bulk of the second half of the book, in which the author follows her husband’s exploitation of a great many other victims in the years following her own personal story. Clearly the author and her family have suffered greatly from this evil man and the stories she cites of all the women whose lives he has damaged are truly appalling. I did however, find it tedious to read these stories, which are all very similar and with the tremendous amount of detail cited I did not feel like I was hearing anything new. It felt like perhaps there was just not enough interesting content to make up a second book.

All in all, with no giant spoilers here, it was nice to see the author and her family come out the other end of this horror story relatively intact. I do find this type of book generally provides a service to the public - the more we know about the existence, behavior and predatory patterns of these monsters, the better we can potentially protect ourselves.

A big thank you to NetGalley, the publisher, and the author for an advance review copy of this book. All thoughts presented are my own.… (mere)