Fenton Johnson (1) (1953–)

At the beginning I detested the writer and the person he was. But reading this book, and seeing the author struggle through his own foibles as he accepted love and worked to care for his dying partner, made me reconsider how quick I am to judge others. We all have roads to walk, and if I could have helped Johnson carry his load during the darkest days, I would have happily assisted. For at the end of the book I admired his strength, his honesty, and his taste in partners. And who he had allowed himself to become. That's the crucial bit. A really important book, I think. For gay people but really for anyone.… (mere)

Fenton Johnson has written a candid story of his own spiritual journey as a gay man distanced from the Roman Catholic church of his youth. The story is told through Johnson's experiences of the contemplative life in Gethsemani, the Trappist monastery near his boyhood home in Kentucky, and in the San Francisco Zen Center. He asks important questions such as the difference between "faith" and 'belief", why Christianity embraced its hierarchical form after the first few centuries, and even what meaning can be found in monasticism. He extensively explores both Buddhism and Catholicism, having been set on that road at a conference between Buddhist monks (including the Dalai Lama) and the Trappist monks at Gethsemani Abbey. Johnson's own personal road mirrors mine in a remarkable number of ways, which made his personal spiritual journey all the more poignant for me (I briefly knew Fenton when we both lived in San Francisco many years ago). Johnson is able to hold open a questioning, skeptical mind, but make genuine efforts to reconcile the issues that so many of us struggle with when it comes to faith, forgiveness, hope, and the varieties of spiritual experience in the world. Johnson helped me frame my own struggle in ways I had not considered before. His book would be helpful for many who feel distanced from their church, but yearn to embrace anew the spiritual dimension of themselves.… (mere)