David Elkind

In All Grown Up and No Place to Go, David Elkind talks about how today’s society is increasing the stressors put onto adolescents and decreasing support due to the view that adolescents are sophisticated and able to make adult decisions. Because of this, they also have no time or space to establish their own identities and create a moral code that will help them make decisions when adults. Elkind stresses that adolescents need to be supported and given limitations so that they do not engage in risky behavior and have time to establish their identities. Additionally, adults should lead by example and base rules on principles rather than emotions. In this way, we can help our adolescents reduce the stress in their lives and achieve an integrated identity.

I think this book is more important than ever. While the passages he uses are largely drawn from fiction (which I found strange) and are slightly outdated, I think that the concepts Elkind present are still relevant and the issue of adolescents facing tougher challenges with less support needs to be addressed both within schools and within the home. And this book gives great advice both for teachers and parents to help adolescents succeed in today's world.

It's not too long and is a relatively fast read -- I do think some portions are unnecessary and can be skimmed, but the key to supporting adolescents is to understand where they're coming from and what they're dealing with. Although I think that there needs to be another updated version of this, what with the internet revolution, Elkind picks up on important ideas that can give adults a better sense of what it is to be a kid today. If you deal with adolescents on a regular basis in your job, or are the caregiver of adolescents, you should give this a read -- I found it to be incredibly helpful.… (mere)

Summary: By blurring the boundaries of what is age-appropriate, by expecting—or imposing—too much too soon, we force our kids to grow up far too fast.
Review: I was thinking about signing up our infant for swimming lessons last year, but now I'm glad that I didn't. I knew that I didn't want to be like Rick Moranis' character in Parenthood, but where do you cross the line? When is it appropriate to encourage the child and when should you back off? A lot of parents around me are signing their kids up for toddler playgroups, Gymboree, swimming, foreign language immersion, etc., etc. 'Socialization' is a word that keeps being mentioned... as in, it's better for the kids than just being with a parent or just being at home. After reading this book, I have better information about why I should take it easy and let our child have time to play.… (mere)